Practice Gratitude

 

This 'back-to-school' season though is particularly difficult. Every day brings news in the papers of another State or school district enforcing stricter COVID-prevention rules in schools. Despite being entirely appropriate, these new guidelines and regulations have created a flurry of chatter and public writings amongst parents and policy makers. Parents are torn: between wanting a return to normalcy, wanting their children to be socializing again, and the concerns about the increasing risks to children of contracting the Delta variant. Needless to say, Dan Sinker's Atlantic article spoke to the frustration, worry and anxiety many households are feeling around the US. Others such as Professor Emily Oster have tried to calm the hearts and minds of parents with a data-focused approach to decision-making when it comes to school re-entry (if you aren't already signed up for her newsletter, check it out on her website). Her approach to finding some peace in these difficult times amounts to a way to think about quantifying your own risk tolerance in deciding about in-person school or child care.

Now, as much as data helps, there is also always an element of the unknown in everything we do in life. So whereas we can increase our comfort levels significantly by making informed personal decisions that are good for our families, we also need to find ways to remain upbeat and positive with that small element of risk that life always presents to us. In essence, we may not have control over several aspects of the pandemic but do we have control over how we see things.

 

I've written before about practicing gratitude but I thought today I'd re-state it. I've been regularly reminded of the importance of practicing thankfulness or gratitude for the last 3 weeks at our little summer chapel here in Cape Neddick. Retired Bishop Gary Lillibridge has focused on this topic, perhaps prescient to all the chatter going on around us. He comes from a place of acknowledging the eternal pursuit of happiness by man and the realization that as humans our instinct is to complain, see the glass half-full, and to generally be negative about our lot in life. He has been focused on reminding us of the importance of practicing thankfulness every day as a means to refocus our minds away from the negative. Gratitude and thankfulness are of course not Christian practices exclusively. Yogic-related philosophies and therapists focus on the power of positivity and again call for a daily practice that is simple and easy to do.

 

So today's newsletter is short and focused on a list of ways to increase gratitude and thankfulness in your daily life as a means to reframe the difficulties we continue to face. You need only do one, not all. Note how you feel in a week or two:

 

-Set your clock 15 mins earlier every day. Find a quiet space. Sit on the floor or on a chair. Take some deep breaths. Hear the birds (possibly) waking up. Focus on three things you'd like to see in your day that would make it a great day. Take a moment to consider three things that you are grateful for this very day. If you need something more guided, check out the Insight Timer app. Absolutely amazing resource for all things meditation.

 

-At breakfast, sit with your family and share one thing that you are looking forward to today. Listen to each other attentively. If you are inclined, take a moment to hold hands as a family and say a small word of thanks.

 

-Take at least one break during your day to walk outside somewhere and ponder how the day has gone so far. Look up at the trees, the sky, the flowers—whatever gives you a sense of joy. Smile at a stranger. Say hello.

 

-If/when you pick up your child/ren from school, find a moment either on the drive home or when home to hear about their day. Make sure your phones are away. Listen attentively. Be in awe of what your child is seeing, learning and doing.

 

-At dinner, if you are inclined, hold hands and ask each person at the table to say something they are thankful for.

 

-At bedtime, say a word of thanks or thought for people that you love who are not with you, or someone who you know needs extra attention or help.

 

Undoubtedly there are a wide variety of things we can do to increase positive thinking in ourselves and our children. These are just a few practices I do with mine and on my own.

 

As for the end of summer, one last idea shared by Dr. Laura Markham was to create a family summer album. I've never done one but this year I intend to do it. One for my family and one for my parents to capture all the beautiful moments we were lucky enough to share together this summer.

 

Happy Labor Day long-weekend!

 

PS: Let me know other ways in which you practice gratitude on your own, or with your children.